Heading Off Into the Sunset
If you didn’t it know already, I am a Type A. I thought that this meant that I was organized, detail oriented, and highly motivated. And yes, these are all included in the list of personality traits associated with Type A. But so are impatient, stressed out, and a workaholic. Yikes! Knowing I am Type A, it won’t come as a surprise to you that I did a Google search on how to get mentally prepared for retirement. Oh wait, you didn’t realize I was retiring? Yes, when the last of my chickadees (both of them) head off to college next fall, I will officially retire from my job as… stay at home mom! This is both exciting and scary. Apparently there are five stages of retirement. As a Type A, I feel like should have known about these stages, and I should already be preparing for Stage One: pre-retirement. Although as many of you know, a stay at home mom can barely keep her head above water sometimes, so I am late to the game in my preparation to head off into the sunset.
That phrase “heading off into the sunset” implies a gentle transition with simplicity and ease. I know my retirement isn’t going to be like that at all. I think we can all agree that any transition in life is difficult. Whether you are going to college, entering the workforce, becoming a parent, moving, or leaving a relationship, change can be complicated and messy. I guess that’s why I’m thinking about it now, so I can be ready when the time comes. The stages of retirement that I discovered are pre-retirement, honeymoon, disenchantment, reorientation and stability. I’ll sum these up quickly for you. Pre-retirement is the planning stage where you think about all the things you’d like to do and what it will be like. Honeymoon: everything is great! Disenchantment is the phase where you think, what the heck have I done or I kind of hate this! Reorientation requires the most effort. You are reimagining who you are and what you want. Stability= yay, I finally figured it out! While I am applying these stages to my impending retirement, they can be applied to many situations. It’s nice to have these in your back pocket for when you need them. Just in case.
I think my retirement is going to be emotional. I know this because it was already so hard to say goodbye when my daughter moved to D.C. to start life on her own. But I was ok because I still had the boys at home to keep me company. I have been completely spoiled by my kids because I have a great relationship with all of them. I have to give credit to my mom here because I have a great relationship with her too, and I wanted that with my own kids. Watching my daughter become an independent young woman, and the boys grow into confident and self assured young men has been the greatest gift I could ever receive. How many people can say that about their job? Staying at home for the last twenty-four years with my three kids did not come without a lot of sacrifice, but I would do it again in a heartbeat. I would do it again because when I think about all the things I am going to miss, it makes me terribly sad. I am going to miss late night talks, family dinners, and hearing about their day at school or work. I will miss their laughter, and I will even miss wiping away their tears. Those are the moments when you realize what life is all about. It’s not about what you have in your life, but who you have in your life.
I’ll be hugging those two boys a little tighter until the fall when I have to say goodbye. And I know I’ll call my daughter to help me though those first few months of my retirement. I’m sure she’ll be giving me some of the same pep talks I’ve given her over the years… I guess things will come full circle like their supposed to… I just hope I’m ready.
