When You Win You Win, When You Lose You Learn
I am attributing this quote to the great Lionel Ritchie, but I’m sure other amazing and successful people have said this too. I started watching American Idol again, and if you are in the mood for spectacular performances from some brave and talented young people, then you should be watching as well. And not only is it entertaining because of the music, but because of the words of wisdom from Ritchie. I don’t know what it is about him, but he has these great one-liners that cut right to the chase. His insight and understanding go far beyond the world of music. This quote reminds me of all the wonderful things we can learn from life if we are receptive to the difficult moments and roadblocks that try to push us off balance.
Is there a time in your life where you lost out on something and it turned out to be a good thing? Maybe it was a job opportunity, an acceptance to (what you thought was) your dream school or a breakup? Maybe you didn’t realize it at the time, but a lost opportunity can lead you to develop a part of you that you didn’t even know existed. You might find strength, grit, determination or perseverance. I look back on some years of my life and think, how did I not crumble into a million pieces? Why didn’t my head explode?
When I was in my twenties and had no idea what I was doing with my life, it would have been easy to head down a road of worry, frustration, sadness and anger. When I was in my thirties at home with three small children and no career, it would have been easy to go down that same road again. Now that I am in my forties (the last little bit) and facing an empty nest with not a lot of direction, I am in the same boat again. I’m not saying all of these times in my life were times of loss, but as a mom you do tend to lose a part of yourself in the process of taking care of everyone else. But the things I have gained from my life far outweigh what I may have lost.
The ironic thing about my life is that all of those times of loss or doubt or uncertainty have led me right to this blog. If things had been any different in my life, if one thing had been shifted, I don’t think I would be in the same place as I am now. I feel like that’s the lesson in losing. All of those little moments of loss put you on a path to greatness; and greatness doesn’t mean perfection. Greatness is when you are at your happiest- when you are proud of the life you have built for yourself and whoever you chose to share it with. Winning sure feels good at first, but you could argue that some loss is actually better for us in the long run. I guess it all comes down to perspective. What are you going to do with what you have been given?
I’ll leave you with another quote from Ritchie:
“It’s not the end of the road, it’s a bend in the road.”
Where will the bend lead you?
